My life has become a complicated roller-coaster over the past year. Nothing that I thought would happen has happened. Last year at this time I was toying with the idea of leaving my husband. I quickly realized after doing this blog that the reasons I had for leaving were baseless...Meaningless crap that every marriage has to deal with. I decided to just deal with the annoying traits that make my husband my husband.
However, in late January of this year I learned that there was a larger pull on my husband than I had ever imagined. Once again Joe and I were involved in a ridiculous argument. He once again lied to me about something that I can't even remember now. I stormed out the door and drove over to visit my mother...on the way Joe sent me a text saying I needed gas. (Well duh, I can read the bloody gas gauge.) I in anger text back, "Go to hell...I don't want to talk to you again until the divorce." Of course I had threatened divorce a lot, as he had as well.
Joe is Army guard and left the next day on a two week deployment out of the state. We had not resolved the issue when he left. Over the next couple days, more heated texts flew between our two cell phones. Half jokingly, half curious I text "Why are you acting like a complete ass, is there another woman?"
To my horror the text I received back was a simple, "yes!"
I immediately called him, of course he duct my first 100 calls, and when I finally reached him he said he was busy with classes. Yeah right!
Regardless to say the next two weeks the phones were used constantly. Me asking who is this other woman, him once again lying and saying I don't know her. He just met her in January at the airport. I asked if he was really going to end an 11 year relationship on a girl he just met at the airport less than a month ago.
When I finally got the truth from him, it turned out that it was the same home-wrecking slut that I had worried about years earlier.
In 2006, my husband was stationed 6 hour away from home. While he was up there he met a family that he became VERY close to. I had often called to find him making dinner with Amanda and the kids. When I asked where Amanda's husband was, I was told at work. Alarmed that my husband was alone at a strange woman's house, I drove the 300 miles to find out what was going on.
Joe assured me that nothing was going on and that they were just friends. I didn't think anything about it, until in December 2008 my husband loaned the same woman nearly 1000 dollars to rent a car. I was livid, and demanded that he get the money back immediately (took 2 months).
I finally met the family in August 2009 at the state fair. I hated them immediately. Amanda was a brackish bitch that beat up on her injured husband and pawned the children off onto anyone passing by. I was worried as well as I watched her hang onto my husband and demand on going on rides with Joe.
This all ended when Joe returned home in December 2009, so I thought. That is until I started seeing emails, texts, and messages from Amanda in October. I once again demanded that my husband stop communicating with her, which he obliged so I think until this past January.
During the drill in which my husband told me there was another woman, he told me that he was leaving me for her and that he would not be returning home after the drill. He was actually going to move directly in with the now divorced and childless Amanda (OCS took her children because she is mentally unstable). When I learned this I understood why she was so desperate to regain access to my husband.
I told my husband to give it three months and I guaranteed that Amanda would have moved on to someone else. This prediction was justified when two weeks later she had moved back in with her ex0husband (poor bastard). She had already had him charged with domestic violence and lied about him in every manner. This did however convince my husband to stay with me.
I told him no more contact with Amanda. Yeah that lasted all of a month. Here it is August 2011 and there are 17 texts and 2 phone calls between the two of them just yesterday.
I want to fight for our 10 year marriage, but I am not strong enough to keep fighting.
I want to give him an ultimatum..Her or me. But I worry he will choose the once again single and still childless Amanda.
I am not sure if there is a way to save this marriage. He insists that they are just friends, but he says that he loves her and has feelings for her.
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